My Youtube Channel was deleted :'C *cries

Super angry face panda ... or something of that sort.
My youtube channel of 2+ years was deleted. I cried. I cant even begin to explain how much effort and time i put into the channel. I had 130,000+ video views and 1,250+ subscribers. This seriously has to happen to me? After all this work? All the amazing people Ive met through my channel. And the friends Ive made. Im so glad I was able to meet them.
Ive made a new channel. Getting it up to the old subscriber count that I used to have will not be easy. Yea I have some loyal subscribers that will come looking for me. But they arent all of them so this will not be easy. But I am so so so glad I do have them. They really are the ones that matter to me :) <3
My blog that I had had for about a week was deleted too with the deletion of my channel and email account. Curse you GMAIL for linking accounts and deleting everything with the email!
*sigh*
It feels like ive lost a piece of who I am. Lost memories of things Ive done. Like the videos Ive made that are now forever gone in the internet abyss :'( Like "Princess Leia's Ass > u> and Cami Spitting and many other videos I no longer have for various reasons. Some of my videos were pieces of artwork to me. In a sense.  and now they are gone forever. So for me to cry over this was not like crying over spilt milk. It felt like experiencing a death. And thinking about it now hurts.
Thinking about a "Plan of action" after this happened led me to think that this may be a good fresh start. I hadnt liked what I had named my original account anyways :S AxReASoNxToxScReAM ( all those stupid "x"s were because youtube deosnt let you use spaces and I used upper and lowercase because at the time I thought that it looked cooler than axreasonxtoxscream) I stll go by a reason to scream though. Just not as often as Risa Fox. So now this is a new start... almost like a "New Year".
I hop to make this new channel far better. And eventually get far more subscribers and views than on my last channel.
I hate feeling like I have nothing to prove for myself now though. My youtube was basically my passion in life.
RIP: AxReASoNxToxScReAM :S I will miss you <3
-Risa Fox